Club Dares: Tell A Stranger You’re Glad Fabric Closed

Dare #11: Make the club great again.

It’s about time we see change in the club. With persistent sexual harassment, shifting moral values towards GHB and our tumultuous current political climate, the nightclub is perhaps the last social environment where you can really make a difference. It’s your time (and dare) to bring pamphlets to the rave in an attempt to raise awareness of the problems you care about and transform your peers into truly woke partiers. It may be best to position yourself just past the coat check in order to alert each and every entrant.

Dare #12: Tell a stranger that you’re glad Fabric closed.

Just do it and see what happens. o_O

Dare #13: Dress up for the occasion, because clubs are “culture” now.

If German courts have placed (certain) clubs in the same tax bracket as theater, concerts and museums, why don’t we dress the same to dance as we do when we’re going to a Shakespeare play? Forget your light-up shoes and cute lil black S&M harnesses—it’s time to break out your fascinator, tuxedo and gown. Bring a book, take some notes and sip your drink with your pinky out, because this is CULTURE, people.

Dare #14: Protest the DJ.

As public figures, DJs have to worry about what they say, tweet and do, what name they pick for their alias and which other artists they agree to play with. One wrong move and they’ll get a virtual lynch mob calling for the end of their career on every social media platform imaginable. While this vocal method of enacting social justice is often effective, it can also come off a little sanctimonious and lazy. So we dare you to practice your activism in REAL life. Tired of hearing the same tunes every weekend? Make a sign that says “STOP PLAYING RINSED TRACKS” and picket their set. Tired of all-male lineups? Get out there and BOO THOSE DUDES!

Dare #15: Call the police on yourself.

At the end of a long night, you might find yourself feeling a little overwhelmed by all the laws you’ve broken, and just looking in the mirror will make you sick. You’re tired, you’ve embarrassed yourself enough and violated your own morals, and you just want to go home and get it over with. So just call the police on yourself already. Think about it: it’s the fastest way to a quiet place to lie down, you’ll get a free ride to somewhere far away from the puke-covered bathroom, and, face it: you deserve it.

Read the first five Club Dares here and our Festival Dare edition here.

Published October 07, 2016.